Joy
Joy
Hi, I’m Joy, but I don’t really know what my parents were thinking when they called me that. My life hasn’t really been full of it. I don’t really know how I ended up like this, things used to be better. I had a happy childhood, and a good education, my parents tried hard to make sure I had a good start in life. I got good results at school and went to University to study law. Trained as a solicitor, met a great man, got married and was working hard. It was a good job, but very demanding. We worked hard, too hard I guess. Looking back that’s probably where it all started. The drinking I mean. At first it was fine, we worked hard and the days were long – it was sometimes 10 o’clock before I left the office – but the rewards were good. Then as the workload increased it became more stressful, so I had a little drink just to get me through. I managed like this for years - I don’t really remember when it got out of hand. My husband used to go on at me about it, but it wasn’t a problem for me. I just hid the bottles from him, so he didn’t know, but he always found them somehow.
Eventually it came out at work because I was working late – only had a couple of drinks just to keep me going. I crashed on a bend on the way home and hit a tree. I was tired; it was nothing to do with the drink. But of course, work didn’t see it like that, they said they knew I’d been drinking for a while, they just couldn’t prove it. So that was that. I lost my job because I was convicted of drink-driving. Well, I couldn’t get to work anyway after I lost my licence. Then I lost my husband. He said he couldn’t take it any more and if I wasn’t prepared to try and change, he was leaving.
I did try, I went to AA meetings, but the people there weren’t like me, they had been serious drinkers. I’m not like that, I just drink to get through the day, I don’t think it’s a problem. I look after myself in other ways; I go out for a walk every day. I have to go out to get out of the house, I’m still out of work, I’ve applied for loads of jobs, but I’m not even getting interviews, I’m not sure why. I don’t eat much ‘cos I can’t afford to – it’s much cheaper to buy a bag of chips or a Pot Noodle than it is to buy a bag of fresh fruit.
I live in a rented place with my sister Mary – she’s got nowhere to go as she left her latest bloke. So now there’s the two of us. Getting through the day.